All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
