Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
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