He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
me + whiskey = a bad person
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
Randomize
