I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
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