when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize