that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
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