just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
Randomize