dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
So called my VP's house on Sunday drunk and told him that if he didn't hire me for the new position I would skull fuck his wife. They asked me to go home today. Thanks again Vodka
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
