i was born a porn star she said
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
