the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
Pooping to opera.
Randomize
