Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
I guess I fist pumped too hard. I hit my mom in the face and now we're sitting in the ER.
When we told the nurse what happened, she replied with "OH, Well you don't look Italian to me!"
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
Operation Purity has been aborted
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Randomize
