kristin has been a bad kristin
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
Randomize