ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
lol hangovers are for mortals.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
