when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
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