that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
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