Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
Randomize
