You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
Well I just put wine in my tea
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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