yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
Randomize
