What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
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