Walk of Shame. In a state park.
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
Randomize
