can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize