I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize
