i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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