Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
Randomize
