'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
You made out with two different species that night
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
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