i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
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