Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
Febreezed myself at a stop light on the way to the IRS office. Judgmental glare from some old lady in the car next to me, thumbs up from her husband.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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