Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
Banned from zoo.
Again?
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
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