i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
