There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Showing up at the grocery store at 5am to have the clerk sprint to the condom cabinet waiving the keys because you told him to hurry it was an emergency
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
