This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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