just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
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