everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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