have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
So I have to send you an email about my weekend, heretofore referred to as The Perfect Weekend. Wherein I have lots of awesome sex with a guy with THE MOST AMAZING BODY.
I look forward to this email. I will respond with, Condoms and Creepers: The Adventures of Online Dating.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
