Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
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