Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Randomize
