Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
i wish my penis had a tongue
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
I ACCIDENTALLY HOOKED UP WITH A GUY WHO HAS A NICHOLAS CAGE POSTER ABOVE HIS BED I CANT HANDLE LIFE.
The universe is either telling you 1. you make terrible decisions or 2. its time to let go of your hatred of Cage.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
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