Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Randomize
