The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Randomize
