This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Randomize
