Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
i drank out of a bidet.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
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