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this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
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