My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Randomize
