mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
