I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
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