There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
