I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
Randomize