We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
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