So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Randomize
