R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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