Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize
