Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Randomize
